Sunday, July 11, 2010

Rajinikanth getting kicked, Unprobable!!!

1. Rajinikanth makes onions cry.
2. Rajinikanth can delete the Recycle Bin.
3. Ghosts are actually caused by Rajinikanth killing people faster than Death can process them.
4. Rajinikanth can build a snowman... out of rain.
5. Rajinikanth can strangle you with a cordless phone.
6. Rajinikanth can drown a fish.
7. When Rajinikanth enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on,.. he turns the dark off.
8. When Rajinikanth looks in a mirror the mirror shatters, because not even glass is stupid enough to get in between Rajinikanth and Rajinikanth.
9. Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Rajinikanth can throw Brett Favre even further.
10. The last digit of pi is Rajinikanth. He is the end of all things.
11. Rajinikanth does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
12. Bullets dodge Rajinikanth.
13. A Handicap parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning, that the spot belongs to Rajinikanth and that you will be handicapped if you park there.
14. Rajinikanth' calendar goes straight from March 31st to April 2nd, no one fools Rajinikanth.
15. If you spell Rajinikanth wrong on Google it doesn't say, "Did you mean Rajinikanth? " It simply replies, "Run while you still have the chance."
16. Rajinikanth can do a wheelie on a unicycle.
17. Once a cobra bit Rajinikanth' leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
18. When Rajinikanth gives you the finger, he's telling you how many seconds you have left to live.
19. Rajinikanth can kill two stones with one bird.
20. Rajinikanth was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
21. Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Rajinikanth can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
22. There is no such thing as global warming. Rajinikanth was cold, so he turned the sun up.
23. Rajinikanth can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
24. Rajinikanth has a deep and abiding respect for human life? unless it gets in his way.
25. Rajinikanth once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
26. In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Rajinikanth could use to kill you, including the room itself.
27. Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Rajinikanth.
28. Rajinikanth destroyed the periodic table, because Rajinikanth only recognizes the element of surprise.
29. Rajinikanth got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
30. With the rising cost of gasoline, Rajinikanth is beginning to worry about his drinking habit.
31. The square root of Rajinikanth is pain. Do not try to square Rajinikanth, the result is death.
32. When you say "no one's perfect", Rajinikanth takes this as a personal insult.
33. Outer space exists because it is afraid to be on the same planet with Rajinikanth.
34. Rajinikanth has counted to infinity – twice
35. When Rajinikanth does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he's pushing earth down
36. Rajinikanth is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
37. Rajinikanth doesn’t wear a watch. HE decides what time it is.
38. Rajinikanth gave Mona Lisa that smile
39. Rajinikanth can slam a revolving door
40. Rajinikanth's house has no doors, only walls that he walks through.
41. Rajinikanth grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
42. If you google search "Rajinikanth getting kicked" your search will generate 0 results. It just doesn't happen.
43. It takes Rajinikanth 20 mins to watch 60 minutes
44. The Bermuda Triangle used to be the Bermuda Square, until Rajinikanth kicked one of the corners off.
45. There are no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Rajinikanth lives in Chennai
46. Rajinikanth once age an entire bottle of sleeping pills. They made him blink
47. The only thing that runs faster and longer than Rajinikanth are his films.
48. Rajinikanth every step creates a mini whirlwind. Hurricane Katrina was the result of a morning jog.
49. Where there is a will, there is a way. Where there is Rajinikanth there is no other way.

For more jokes, click here.

35 comments:

Anonymous said...

Suraj Randiv can never bowl a noball to Rajinikanth because Rajinikanth can alwas move the crease behind the bowler

Anonymous said...

If Rajni Kanth acted in Titanic, he would survive carrying Kate Winslet in one hand and Titanic in the other, from the ocean.

Anonymous said...

Rajni is never thirsty it is water which is yearning to come into his mouth.

Anonymous said...

rajnikanth is retard and so are u all!!

Anonymous said...

So are u, u retard anonymous :P

Anonymous said...

once a girl lost her virginity....rajnikant brought it back:P

Anonymous said...

. Who discovered the old sea scrolls ? They were not lost. Rajnikanth had kept them away for kicks.
. God is not Rajnikanth
. What are earthquakes ? They occur when Rajnikanth shivers in the cold.
. At what temperature does Rajnkanth shiver in the cold ? At 0 degrees Kelvin.
. How hot is lava ? Warm enough for Rajnikanth to heat is morning cup of coffee.
. What happened to the Gregorian Calendar ? Does not exist any more. It was BR (Before Rajnikanth)
. Why did it take 18 days for the battle of Kurukshetra to get over ? It is in BR. Rajnikanth did not fight.
. What happened to the third world war ? Rajnikanth won it already.
. Why did the terrorist strike Mumbai / Delhi and not the South ? Too risky with Rajnikanth on the prowl.
. How are lakes formed ? They are the footprints of Rajnikanth filled with water.
. Rajnikanth can strike a match, light a cigarette and smoke it all in one throw.
. Rajnikanth can get gold silver and bronze medals in the same event at the Olympics
. Rajnikanth can drink up the entire ocean
. Rajninanth can cure desease by just staring at it.
. Rajnikanth can break out of Fort Knox

Anonymous said...

Rajnikanth can make weirdness feel weird!! Mind it

Harry K said...

Hey if boyz can understand this, then maybe they can understand their own weirdity too :P Kudos to Ranjni guy!!

vikram said...

Paul the octopus was supposed to predict Rajnikanth's death. Paul died last night!!!

Aditi Verma said...

Rajni shoud change his name, there is nothing rajni-cant do!!

vikram said...

Rajnikant ordered McDonalds home delivery. They sent the President of the United States on Air Force One to deliver it

Anonymous said...

Breaking news: NASA has shut down since Rajnikanth bought all it's rockets for diwali!!!

Anonymous said...

Rajnikanth's email address is gmail@rajnikanth.com.

Anonymous said...

||RAJNIKANTH CHALLISA ||

|| YADA YADA HI DHARMASYA
GLANIR BHAVATI BOLLYWOOD/TOLLYWOOD ||

||ABHYUTTHANAM ADHARMASYA
TADATMANAM RAJNIKANTHAM ||

BHAWARTH: JAB AB JAB BOLLYWOOD/TOLLYWOOD PE PAAP BAREGA
JAB JAB LOG ADHARM KE RASSTE PAR CHALEGATAB TAB PARAM SHRI “RAJNIKANTH JI” WILL COME IN THE SCENE (IN SOME FORM OR OTHER.LIKE ROBOT AND SHIVAJI ) or INCARNATE HIMSELF

Anonymous said...

The best Rajnikanth facts page:

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Rajnikanth-facts/133591076660075

Vikram Pratap Singh Thakur said...

khaufnak andheri raat me
12 baje 1 bhooth 2nd bhoot ko samja raha tha ghabra mat,
ye tere dimag ka vahm hai,
koi rajnikant-vajnikant nhi hota!!!

Dhruv said...

rajnikanth has already been to mars...dats why der r no signs of life..

MILIND said...

1.rajni can win mario without the jump button.
2.before tom cruise rajni was offered the role in mission impossible but he felt the title personally insulting to him

vikram said...

Google search for the phrase "Rajinikanth getting kicked" results in no result. Rajinikanth getting kicked is a myth!!!

akash bagri said...

mast hai be

akash bagri said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

When Graham Bell first invented the telephone...

..
...........
When Graham Bell first invented the telephone...

....................................

er..............

He found 2 missed calles from RRRRRRRRRRRRR

sagar said...

police says rajani ko pakdana muskil hi nahi na munkin hai.

Vikram said...

interesting post on whether rajinikanth way of throwing up a cigarette in the air and lighting it is patentable.

http://www.sinapseblog.com/2011/07/are-rajinikanth-methods-patentable.html

Anonymous said...

rajinikanth getting kicked is a misnomer!!!

Anonymous said...

U r all retarded!! Go get a life!!

Anonymous said...

Once a boy broke Rajnikanths window while playing cricket.Rajnikanth asked him to play slowly. Now that boy is known as the wall of Indian Cricket RAHUL DRAVID =))

Funny Rajnikanth Jokes said...

Good Collection but little outdated. Please bring some new stuff. Regards.

Anonymous said...

This is all rubbish. Rajnikant is nothing

once batmen rode his car fast and rajnikant lost his hairs...

Anonymous said...

Rajnikanth won guinness world record for surviving in film industry for so long without knowing acting (with only styles)

Sushant said...

once a boy was shouting outside rajnikanth's house. rajnikanth asked him to shut-up. now the boy is known as manmohan singh...

Anonymous said...

Rajanikanth showed middle finger to his wife once, next day she got pregnent :P

Moods Condoms said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

when we are in stress we say oh god ; when god is in stress he says oh rajnikant

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